Archive for the ‘Karim Ramos’ Category

I learned a few things today:

  • Suntan lotion is ineffective outside if you miss your ears (oops).
  • Leg lifts on a faux concrete table make the bum hurt.
  • Gloves are helpful if one desires to not have little pebbles crushed into the palms of their hands while dong long armed planks.

Today’s Boot Camp Workout (insert loud “tad-daaaah!” here):

My warm up was a road cycle to the park with a 12lb back pack followed by 1/2 mile brisk walk (twice around the track).

Circuit One Circuit Two Circuit Three
25 Squats x 2 15 Table Squat Thrusts x 3 Jump in Place 45 Seconds x 1
15 Chest Push-Ups x 3 15 Walking Lunges x 3 Run in Place 60 Seconds x 2
25 Step-Ups (small) x 1 20 Leg Lifts x 3 Long Arm Plank 60 Seconds x 3
20 Step-Ups (tall) x 3 Lap the Track x 2 (1/4 Mile)
Lap the Track x 2 (1/2 Mile)

pushupstable

Chest Push Ups
These are modified push-ups that do not involve the knees (aka: “girl push-ups”). You can use a table at home, a park bench, anything that is off the ground. You then plant your hands on the edge of the table or bench about shoulder width apart, and straighten your legs. Your body should be at about a 45 degree angle. Your butt shouldn’t be high in the air, your knees should not be bent (like the faceless guy to the left). Once you are in position, lower yourself down and push yourself up. Do this for 15 reps.

squatthrustTable Squat Thrusts
This is a modified version of squat thrusts. I’m certain someone somewhere has a name for it, but until I’m notified of it, it shall be deemed Table Squat Thrusts. Plant your hands on the the bench of a picnic table (the part you sit on) or the last riser of a bleacher, box, or whatever other object you would like to use. Draw your legs up under you in squat position (you’ll look like you’re going to do a leap frog move). With your hands on the bench, drive your legs back so they are straight and bring them back under you to squat position (this picture here demonstrates how a regular squat thrust is done, just add a table or a bench). You can bring yourself up to standing position or stay in squat position.There is some impact on the knees, so if yours are a little crummy adjust how hard you drive your legs back.

If you have an exercise you’d like to do but your body is saying “NO WAY”, drop a line to spdiaries@gmail.com. We can find a modification for you!

huuuuuhI love to share my unexpected moments of shame with the world. Like the day my pants fell down at the gym; or the day I slid seven feet to the floor off a Stair Master (twice); or the day my water bottle fell off the spin bike and exploded on the floor (that was my first spin class…my second was seven months later); or the day I had an all out brawl at Kohl’s in the lingerie (long-er-ay) section with Spanx (you know those were meant to be stepped into, not pulled over like a super big compression wrap?).

So I thought to invite you- the readers of Sneaker Porn Diaries, those who follow, and those who would never admit to following but they do – what’s your silly weight loss story?

The deadline for the Silliest Story…Like…Ever contest is July 15th, 2013. Submit your stories to sneakerporndiaries@yahoo.com using the following format:

Please put “SNP Silly Story Contest” in the subject line of your email.
Please keep your stories to no more than 700 words, check spelling and punctuation.
Be sure to include your before & after picture, and a picture of your favorite pair of sneakers.
Share your starting & current weight, age, city & state where you live.
First names and the first letter of your last name will be shared on the blog if your story is chosen.
If you have a blog, please include the blog address so your journey can be viewed by other readers!

Deadline for submissions is July 15th, 2013. The Silliest Story winners will be announced on July 20th, 2013. And yes, there will be a PRIZE!

Somewhere across the country there’s a secret collective of post-op dairy farmers. They haven’t been clear on their target market, or the cost of their product to consumers when it officially hits store shelves. One thing is clear: confidential sources have revealed they’re milking it for all it is worth.

Ugh.

Piece of advice: if you fell off the post-op salad truck, STOP posting, ‘What do I DO???” all over the internet. If you are a weight loss surgery post op for any length of time (two seconds, two months, two years, two decades), you know what you are supposed to do…unless of course you were hit on the head with fried Twinkies. Then you could be suffering from WLSPOA (weight loss surgery post op amnesia).

To avoid becoming a POW, try the following steps:

1. Talk to someone. You have a primary care doctor, you have a surgeon, you have a nutritionist. If any of these professionals have mysteriously vanished out of your life (alien abduction?)…FIND SOMEONE NEW. If you’re unable to do so then my assumption would be you reside on an island in total solitude, which means you have no access to communications and will not read this anyway.

2. If you know you’re eating habits are bad, and you know you have consumed that which you probably are not supposed to (like a container of crispy oatmeal chocolate chip cookies from Trader Joe’s), get over it. It’s summer. You can grow stuff. Even better, you can pay someone who grew it already.

3. If you have the phrase “I can’t afford to” flashing behind your eyelids in reference to item #2, hold your tongue. Chances are incredulously high you have, oh let’s see: all the cable channels, all the movie channels, a smart phone and a big ol’ plan.

I whine to a select few of my friends, none of whom give me one ounce of slack because they’ve been privy to my weight loss changes. I don’t complain online all that often. Usually I will talk to someone who puts me in my place. I also yell at people. Ask my friend Anne. I chased her bum back across the football field at boot camp a few weeks ago for short-cutting the track, later I made her do half leap frogs. My trainer gives me no slack at all-and it has nothing to do my picture he put on his car advertisement. It’s because he remembers when I was the fattest woman in the gym, how my stomach drug the ground during push ups, or how 40lbs made a world of difference in climbing 17 steps.

God, you have so much to celebrate. Don’t be a POW. Don’t focus on the prison and the chains…neither hold you anymore.

If that doesn’t encourage you, get stuck somewhere. I got wedged in that little space there between the bed and nightstand over the weekend to fix the carpet. I hadn’t laughed that hard at myself in a long, long time.

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